The reality of having to cut off someone for protecting your children is not a one day decision. There is nothing light about it. In fact it’s heavy and a grieving process takes place. I grieve what could have been. I grieve the reality of the choices made and the lies that have stepped in between us.

No more hearing your voice, and sending things about our day. No more seeing pictures of each other’s kids, and sending gifts for Holidays. These days have come to an end not by my desire, but by the constant victim pattern and mindset.

As soon as the boundary is set the cold creeps in. Guilt from my flesh. Gaslight from the other side. The darkness of ones sin is now exposed staying blind of the truth. No matter who you are in my life if you cannot respect me, or be safe, you lose the privilege of being part of my children’s lives. There is no apology that needs to take place for choosing safety. But that doesn’t mean this doesn’t break my heart.

Cautiously I hope to rebuild what has crumbled this relationship. But for now I will protect, and grieve.