Playdough and Emotions

If you take different colors of Play-Doh, Label them different emotions and mix them all together That is how I would describe my week. But I would take those pieces and make it into a shape of a heart because despite all the big emotions God is giving me a sense of peace throughout this week and I have still been able to give my kids the best version of myself.

With it being Jason‘s birthday, and my brothers anniversary and combating grief missing my sister-in-law. My friend lost her baby and it hit home for me.  And also being excited for my other brother getting married on Halloween. Going through the bitter sweet emotions of my baby turning three and having a very active busy week way more than usual. There was pajama day at school and Jason had show and tell and snack one day and we had to get his cake and balloon. Then we are celebrating Halloween and a few different trunk or treats. So these were added things that we normally don’t do. I’ve definitely been pushed out of my comfort zone. But isn’t it amazing how I can feel all these big emotions and still have peace?

Emotions are crazy and yet even when I’m both grieving and excited I can feel both and with being real with God allowing him in on the tough times to help me to stay focused on giving my babies the gift of a mom staying in tune with them. 

What Is A Mother

I was asked to write down what a mother is. Not who the moms were in my life but to simply define it.

Immediately scripture flooded my mind as I sat to jot down what a Mother is.

She moves in a slow rhythm about her day. She basks in the sound of her children’s laughs, and the feeling of their tiny arms squeezing her around her neck. She embraces her children’s differences and gifts they can carry into the world. She invests beyond their basic needs, dismissing the amount of children there are recognizing her role she took on when she became a mother.

She’s not surviving.

She’s living.

She seeks them.

She seeks them figuring out how they operate: their learning styles, their passions, fears, and insecurities. She knows her children. She navigates a lesson so her children can push through, not around the fears and insecurities the world has to offer. She then feeds encouragement into those passions, and desires. She ignites purpose in their hearts.

She ignites purpose in their hearts.

Her character is watched by her audience as she reacts to situations and those around her.

She practices the fruits of the spirit being filled with love, joy, peace, patience and self-control. Galatians 5:22-23

She imitates her maker. Philippians 2:1-5

She practices the meaning of love. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 “

When she does fail she immediately apologizes.

When her children rebel she disciplines but doesn’t punish. She doesn’t punish for mistakes.

She humbly seeks wisdom through scripture, prayer and godly friends in all seasons.

She doesn’t allow her past to haunt her.

She is rooted in her identity making her role as a mother present.

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You Made Me A Mother

Baby Boy.

You made me face fears I never knew existed.

Climb mountains I never saw myself climbing

Dismiss what I once thought was meaningful.

Ground myself in God’s truth because I want to give you the best even when it hurts me, because sometimes healing does hurt.

You’ve seen me at my worst and best.

You’ve been patient with me as I learn this foreign journey.

You made me a mother,

and for that I owe you my best.