Our Preference For Ethnicity

When we were in the beginning process for foster care there was a stack of paper work asking us specific questions to select what would be a good fit for us. We came across a question that made me wonder why are people specific on what the child would look like? 

The question asked:

“Do you have a preference for ethnicity?”

We looked at one another confused. Ethnicity never came across our minds. Things like behaviors, age, needs made sense to us, but ethnicity didn’t make sense. Curious, I asked our Home Study worker why some are specific on what the child will look like. She said some want their kids to look like their bio kids so people don’t ask questions. When anyone is doing foster care or adopting the crazy questions are apart of the journey. Having them look like you is a small way to avoid it which still becomes unavoidable. The child will still be different from your birth children, because they are. Being an adoptee myself I already know I’m different from parents. I know I look like my birthdad. Looking like my parents isn’t going to change the fact that I am adopted and struggled with what other adopted kids  have struggled with too. Our kid isn’t going to look like us and that is ok. It doesn’t make them less our child. 


I recall an old Sunday school song Jesus Loves The Little Children  as I write. 

“Red and Yellow Black and White they are precious in his sight” (tweet)

It says. Ethnicity doesn’t hold value. At the end of the day no matter our hair, skin, eyes, height, weight, or story Jesus loves the little Children. 

8 thoughts on “Our Preference For Ethnicity

  1. Love this! I think adopted children make the best foster parents, because they have been there themselves. They have a special insight to what the kids are going through and how to love them through it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • thank you!!! we are still waiting for our first hoping to adopt placement so as we wait we continue to do trainings and connecting with other families who have adopted as well.


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