The Hardest Story To Tell: Mine

Mihaela Echols48 Comments
unnamed
the “food” was always mashed up. There were about four of us to a crib.

    The helpless crying baby would cry for the love she needed, but no one would come. She’d cry and hope, cry and hope, cry and hope until there were no more tears to shed.

Left alone.

Abandoned.

    But something inside her told her to keep hoping and keep crying, someone
will hear you. Years she cried and hoped for her life. The hope never died. When the special some ones finally came her crying then, turned into screaming. She wanted so badly to love them back, but how could she if she never knew what love was. Hatred toward people burned in the little girls heart. What happened in her first three years marked her heart in way only God could change. The love her parents showed her was so foreign and yet so addicting. As she grew older fear of losing them grew more each day. She was falling in love. Then they told her about who Love is, how He brought her to them, how he died for her sins and how He loves her. She believed and loves Him back. That day she accepted Christ to be the boss of her life.
The little girl is me.

    I’m alive and shouldn’t be at least that’s what the world says.
It would’ve made the most sense, that is why they call me a survivor.
My first three years of abandonment are only explained by a miracle. What
you just read was only a glimpse of what I went through. As I mentioned I hated people and was locked out from reality. I felt like the world was moving around me waiting to be touched and I was in glass. The only emotion I felt for years was fear. Fear of being hit again, left again, and unwanted. But when I asked Christ to be the boss of my life I became alive. I would “run” the best I could with my hurt little legs, sing, love, and be fearless because He is living me in. There were times I have forgotten my first love, Christ (The Scariest Road), but like in the orphanage He hears my cry and calls me His.

    Romans 8:15 “The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”

Babies were placed on bread trays stacked on racks.
Babies were placed on bread trays and stacked on racks.
Nicolae Ceausescu, the man who started the orphanages.
Nicolae Ceausescu, the man who started the orphanages.
we would rock ourselves for self soothing, and look at our hands because it was the only thing to look at.
we would rock ourselves for self soothing, and look at our hands because it was the only thing to look at.

    Some ask how  could I believe in God after what I went through. My answer is this. I believe there’s a hell. I’ve only tasted it in just three years. Mean people are the result of sin and so badly the Devil wants to rob me from the truth of knowing God and who He is and how He loves us. The Devil thrives off of abuse and will do anything to pull us away from God. Why? Because God is love, joy and enough. 

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/02/20/ptsd-black-sheep/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/06/29/life-verse/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/09/05/her-identity/

Just An Idea

Mihaela Echols2 Comments

                       ProjectHope2    

        It didn’t come from and audible calling from God, or in a dream it was simply an idea. Last fall of 2013 my church, West Sound Community Church was brainstorming ways to reach out to the community. My church in Minnesota would do gift bags for people in jail every year for Christmas and I thought “Why not West Sound?” I ended up getting the number of the lieutenant from the dad of the little girl I nanny for; he is an officer. Then I finally decided to tell Ricki, my pastor the idea.

       That December, West Sound Community church delivered four hundred and fifty gift bags to the people in jail of Kitsap County. Not only are we reaching out to those in jail, but also their families, the officers who are handing out the bags, and everyone who hears about it. This is a simple act of showing God’s love.

     As word got out the Chaplin of the jail contacted me asking if we could bring in Bibles. Of course! Each person he works with receives a study Bible, a book mark with a verse on it, and an encouraging note in the Bible from a member at West Sound. I was also contacted by the juvenile center and have been bringing in treats every month since February 2014 for the kids. My hope is that both ministries will grow and God will keep using West Sound as time goes on.

    West Sound has been a huge encouragement to me as I am continuing on with this ministry through prayer, finances, and words of encouragement. It was simply an idea and I let God do the rest. 

Proverbs 3: 5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.”

To support: write a check to Project Hope

At 2356 NW Rude Rd, Poulsbo, WA 98370

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/12/20/project-hope-what-is-it/

Oh To Fly

Mihaela Echols33 Comments

Oh to fly    

    Pacing, nail biting, heart racing, palms sweating, with anxiety wondering what will come next. We all feel it, whether we are watching a movie, reading a book, or living life. We all want to know what will come next and in this waiting, we dream. Maybe your dream is working your dream job, getting married, starting a family, seeing the world, or doing great things for others. All these things on our hearts are not wrong if for the glory of God and not ourselves. He puts them there for a reason. But why is it so hard for us to allow the maker of dreams dream for us? In this letter below God writes to us in His Princess by: Sheri Rose Shepherd, reminding readers to wait on their dreams because His timing is perfect.  My Princess…wait on Me Wait on Me, My princess. My timing is always perfect. I know you’re anxious about many things, and I see your passion for all the plans I have put on your heart. I know that you long to fly and I see your enthusiasm. However, just as a vine dresser nurtures the vine and waits patiently for the right moment to harvest the grapes, so too am I working tirelessly to prepare you to bear much fruit. Don’t run ahead of Me or try to fly before My plans are complete. Your strength will fail you, and your dreams will wither away. Trust Me that my dreams for you are far greater than you can dream on your own. You will run farther and soar higher if you patiently wait for the season of My blessing. Draw close to Me now, and I promise that this season of waiting will bring you the sweetest of rewards.  Love, Your King and Lord of perfect timings.                                                   Isaiah 40:31

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/09/05/her-identity/

What If I Don’t Marry?

Mihaela Echols28 Comments

    In spite of my purity ring, people have asked me what I will do if I do not get married. This is a great question! My answer is, wear it of course! Yes, even if I am sixty and if I do not marry I will be wearing my purity ring. As I have mentioned in my other writing I Wear This Ring I do not only wear mine only as a reminder of sexual purity before marriage, but also for purity in all areas of my life. Say I do marry, then what happens? Some people add to their purity rings, or save it to pass down to their children. In my case, I will replace it with an engagement ring, and then add the wedding band to it. I’ve explained to other girls that a wedding ring is just another purity, but within marriage. 

    I’ve broken it down below how I view each ring.

    There is the purity ring before marriage, the engagement ring, which would be the purity ring before marriage, but with the future spouse, and the wedding ring will be the purity ring within the marriage.

    To make myself clear, these purity rings are not shields, they will not protect me from the temptations of this world. They are only reminders of who I am living for and serving daily. God tells us in Psalm 119:9 reminding us that we can learn how to stay pure by living according to His word. 

7-24-14

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/06/27/first-kiss/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2013/11/09/i-wear-this-ring/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/08/27/true-love-waits-and-waits-and-waits/

First kiss

Mihaela Echols11 Comments

                                        download

     Sitting here talking with girls my age who have told me they have never been kissed stirs an envy in me. I also applaud their choice. But as soon as they tell me that they will kiss as soon as they start dating I shake my head and ask them why. I have given them my reasoning and strongly encourage girls who have waited this long to finish strong on the wait. Now you are probably thinking wow Mihaela you are so negative and you cant being going around telling people how to live, kissing is not a sin. You caught me, I am negative about kissing when you’ve waited so long already. People may do as they please yes, but I will not stop encouraging girls around my age to wait. You are also right kissing is not a sin, but may lead to it before marriage, but that is another topic for another day.  You may be tired of reading this or have already stopped, but hear me out with my reasoning below.

1) It’s your senior year in high school, only one more school year to go, and you are free! What do you do, finish, or drop out? I hope your answer is finish. You have come so far what would giving up benefit? Yes, it is hard and can be very annoying, but everyone who has graduated, including myself, will say “Yes it is worth it” So ladies at 20, 30, 40, 50, how ever old and have never been kissed why not wait just a little longer for your husbands kiss and not just a boyfriends kiss who could possibly become and ex-boyfriend. 

2) Again you have made it this far why not give 100% to your husband and be able to tell your children Daddy is the only man I’ve kissed. There are plenty of women who have told me it is weird thinking of kissing another person besides their husband.

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/11/11/all-the-single-ladies-put-your-praise-hands-up/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/08/27/true-love-waits-and-waits-and-waits/

 

Be My Escape

Mihaela Echols15 Comments

Dropping my goals
my drink numbs my soul
Everyday strife
Labor for life
I leave the room with out a care
Cigarette smoke of relief lingers in the crisp air
Bloods drips from my shaken wrist
Why was God so easy to resist?
As the blade hits the floor
I give up on this war
Set this soul free
Come and rescue me
As I drop the beer
You become that something clear
I’m tired of feeling like an outsider
Be my provider
Be my soul receiver
My stress reliever
Maker of the stars
Restore my scars
It’s time to end this facade
and let you be my God.

December 17, 2011
By: Mihaela Chamberlain

Embrace Life

Take the Stand

Take the Stand

Mihaela Echols28 Comments

Fifteen year old boy hears about life coming from dust,
and how God is the only one he can honestly trust.

So young boy takes a stand
and gives his life to God’s hand.

Day by day his battle goes on,
fighting with his flesh because he old him is gone.

His peers question his new ways,
disagreeing they don’t choose to stay.

Still, young boy takes a stand
and leaves his life in God’s hand.

Young boy grows and so do his dreams,
but brokenness makes his heart scream.

Let down too many times,
the world was winning with its crimes.

Still he holds onto the news he heard as a boy
even when we are sad we can still have joy.

So young man takes a stand
and leaves his future in God’s hand.

Poisoning his heart,
she was bad news from the start.

His feelings turned into lust.
Desiring God was becoming rust.

Deep in his heart God still shinned
whispering child you are mine.

Young man had to take the stand
and leave his desires in God’s hand.

Hitting his rock bottom he shakes his head.
The fifteen year boy inside him is not dead.

Once again leaving his own desires
leaving her and his life to who is higher.

Young man took a stand
and left his life in God’s hand.

5-4-14

By: Mihaela Chamberlain

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/07/03/i-am-overwhelmed/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2013/07/08/courageous-child/

Goodwill Boys

Mihaela Echols27 Comments
credit : Pinterest.com
credit : Pinterest.com

    The other day I was thinking about all the things in my life that are either cheap or used, my clothes, my car, and even my guitar. Then memories of other cheap things came to mind, weak friendships was one of them. This poem is about people, specifically some guys, who say what we want to hear, do half the things we want, only to keep us around for as long as we’ll stick around. But should we settle for good? Or do we hold out for best? Maybe best will never come? Will we lower our standards because it’s in front of us? Readers Best already came! (John 3:16-17)

    

The shirts that rip and tear
telling you the empty promises that they will be there.

They come with visible stains
causing your heart pain.

Unaware of the stories the shirts hide, you wonder if trying one on will help you decide.

With prince charming actions the thread still pulls.
Yet, it insists it will make life full.

Sitting at arms length,
does your lack of self-control give up all strength?

Or do you walk away from the sweet deals
waiting not for a goodwill boy, but for something real.

April 23rd, 2014

By: Mihaela Chamberlain

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/03/21/the-scariest-road/

The Scariest Road

Mihaela Echols21 Comments

    Have you ever wondered how God or anyone could forgive the choices you’ve made?

          The choices we’ve made are apart of us, but don’t have to define us. 

             I’m going to tell you a story about a girl who forgot her first love. She made one choice and it led to sinning. She took a road and got lost. She was afraid at first, but then was curious and saw how different it was from the other road she had taken before. On the road, there were thorns and rocks that cut her feet up. At first it hurt, but soon she ignored them, justified them, and told herself she could walk through them alone. Her feet bled. Farther along, the thorns had grown as tall as trees. She tried to push through. Regretting her choice, her whole body bled. “God what should I do?” she asked stepping back. 

         “Stop hurting yourself!” He cried through tears. Oh how it hurt him to see His little girl trying to push through the pain. 

       She stepped back for second, and realized that going through would only hurt. Wrapping up her wounds she thought it would help make her feet bleed less. Again, she persisted through the thorns. More blood was spilled as the wounds were becoming deeper. “God what should I do?!” she screamed.

       “Daughter stop. Please stop! There is another way.” He pleaded.

      She stepped back and decided to chop through it with a machete. She lost it in the thorny mess. The sky was getting darker as time passed. More blood dripped. She could hardly see her feet in the blood that was covering them. Pushing through again, her body hated her for this. Finally, after hours of pushing she stepped back. “Oh God, what should I do?” she asked through her hopeless tears.

      “Sit down.” He whispered. 

      She sat. “Now what?”

     Psalm 46:10

      “Daughter I want you to come back to me. Love me. Follow me.” He answered.

      Looking up to heaven she closed her eyes and began walking. She felt water under her feet. Some of her scratches went away as she kept walking through the water and into a grassy meadow. As time went by her scars faded, but remained. She opened her eyes and found where she once was before she went down the scariest road she thought was only in scary stories and didn’t ever want it to become hers.  “Oh God I am so sorry, forgive me, I want to follow you.” she cried. 

       ” I already have.” He answered.

John 10:1-18

      Have you ever wondered how God or anyone could forgive the choices you’ve made? Someone once told me to just keep falling in love with the Lord and I would find that I wont have to forgive myself, because what He has done on the cross for us, is enough. This I believe. 

Dedicated to 3-17-14

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/09/05/her-identity/