Category: Adoption Series

Think About It

Mihaela Echols13 Comments

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What do you think parents should consider before adopting?

Three things: 

  • It’s not a walk in the park
  • You never know what your going to get
  • It’s a life long journey

    It’s not a walk in the park in fact, it’s a walk through thorns. There is a reason why so many adopted children like myself come broken with shattered pasts. There is a reason why adoption exists. The past usually is ugly and so the child views everything in the world the same way, ugly.

    You never know what you are going to get. Some children may be adopted as infants and grow up to be your more challenging child verses the child you adopted at seven. In some cases parents may have an idea of how the child may be but in most cases it’s a risk. 

    Their ugly past will always be apart of them, but they do not have to carry it with them forever. Adoption is where life begins for some of them. You are now apart of their journey as soon as they are yours. You are their hero, even if they don’t see it in the beginning, they will in time. They might say things like “You aren’t my real mom or dad.” on this journey. They might try and hurt your other children if they are biological or themselves on this journey. They are scarred and bitter because they once saw the world as ugly, but you get the opportunity to show them the beauty of the world, and God. Just like a child you have given birth to adopting a child is another life long commitment because by adopting them you are making them yours.

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/04/05/talk-about-adoption/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/02/27/my-hearts-desire/

Daughter I’m Here Now

Mihaela Echols15 Comments

I wasn’t there to dry your tears

to hold you tight when you were afraid,

to give you food when you were hungry,

to help you get better when you were sick,

to laugh and sing with you,

to tuck you in bed at night,

to hold your hand,

I wasn’t there when I wish I could’ve been but I’m here now. I can’t make up for our lost time. But here and now I can give you what you needed then. A hug, words of encouragement, dry your tears, help you face your fears. I’m here to be apart of  the rest of your story.  I’m here… to dream with you, and help you reach goals higher then you could ever imagine. 

To help your heart soar.

To sing with you off key. 

To pray with you during the hard and confusing times. 

I’m here now later than I wanted to be, but daughter lets count the memories God gives. 

I wasn’t here then, but 

I’m here now. 

Your Forever, Mommy

More here: The Hardest Story To Tell: Mine

My Skittle Family

Mihaela Echols1 Comment

20150405_235007Due to the privacy of one of my siblings the name is unmentioned and picture is covered with a flower petal.

    What was your experience like growing up in a multicultural family?

Growing up I would be very annoyed when people would say things like “But your sister is Latino so she really isn’t your sister? Or “Well they aren’t your real siblings”

    According to the world’s standards if I do not  look like my siblings we aren’t related. If we all have different birthparents it is “impossible” to have a bond with eachother in ways birth flamilies do. Adoption world is different. I do not feel closer to my sister fom Romania verses my sister from America. They are all my siblings. It is like asking twins if it is weird to be a twin when their answer would be no why?  Because it is all they know. To me it would be weird to have a sibling that my parents didn’t adopt. I know it’s rude to stare and I wrote an article on it (It’s Rude To Stare) but there are times I would catch myself staring at my friends and their siblings or parents because they do look alike. It is normal for me to see a multicultural family. It is normal for me to hear everyone’s story before they came to be with their forever family.

    What is the biggest age difference between you and your siblings, and how does it effect your relationships?

    Being the oldest girl that already makes me one of the bossy ones. This has also given me the “second mom” standard in my house before I moved out. Because of this I have learned what it takes to run a house and it has opened my eyes to the reality of not wanting twelve children  as one could imagine. My youngest sibling is 6 and my older brother is 26.

    The ages are 6,7,10,14,15,18,18,20,20,23,24,26.

    Based on your experience growing up, what is one thing you plan to do differently When you become a parent?

    I would honestly say more encouragement. Adopted children are more fragile whether they want to admit it or not and need it. All of us have the sad story before we got to live (adoption) and for some the struggle is harder than others. Being encouraged on the little things like how well they listened, or how helpful they were with something on a day to day bases makes them want to seek attention in a positive manner and not feel the burden of being unwanted.

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2013/01/18/mom/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2012/12/29/show-and-tell/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/04/05/talk-about-adoption/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2013/01/18/the-beautiful-t/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2013/07/08/courageous-child/

Talk About Adoption

Mihaela Echols28 Comments

happy-first-birthday

    At a young age I learned how to extend grace, because I was adopted. I was shot with rude comments, questions, and lectures on how to live my life by curious, innocent, and ignorant people. 

     I am starting this series for the ignorant and curious. No more ignorance! It is time to learn about adoption! I have started the Adoption series for those who honestly want to ask me questions on adoption with out stepping on toes. For those who are offended by my readers questions get off now. This is for them and I want to be open and honest with them as well. 

    So let me introduce myself. Hi name is Mihaela, I was adopted at the age of three. My story is found in The Hardest Story To Tell: Mine

    I have five sisters and six brothers; we are all adopted. Some of my siblings are from the foster care system and some from out of the Nation. Each of us are snowflakes, sharing one thing but all so very different. Behind all our eyes there is a broken story to tell, but by the grace of God we have had a beautiful ending, adoption. Or so some think. What most forget is the journey each adopted child takes. It does not end at the adoption day. In fact adoption day is like some of our birthdays. That day itself is the day some of us started living for the first time. 

Ok Readers ask me anything on adoption. This is for you. 

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/03/19/the-hardest-story-to-tell-mine-2/

 

Blood Doesn’t Mean Everything

Mihaela Echols5 Comments

MotherAndChildWalkingTheTracks-850x400

Having a conversation with a fellow adoptee they told me they do not feel close to their parents. To help you understand they are referring to their adoptive parents. So I asked this; how is it you still call them as often as you do and our friends who lived with their birth parents have terrible relationships?

    Blood bonds are deep and I do desire it some day with my child, but I don’t believe it is what makes the relationship. There’s so much more! I am adopted and I still call my parents once a week just to hear them. They seek all of their children, because they are their own. Blood isn’t our bond. I am bonded to them because they chose to normalize our relationship. We are there’s and they committed their lives to us as parents do. 

The Hardest Story To Tell: Mine

Mihaela Echols48 Comments
unnamed
the “food” was always mashed up. There were about four of us to a crib.

    The helpless crying baby would cry for the love she needed, but no one would come. She’d cry and hope, cry and hope, cry and hope until there were no more tears to shed.

Left alone.

Abandoned.

    But something inside her told her to keep hoping and keep crying, someone
will hear you. Years she cried and hoped for her life. The hope never died. When the special some ones finally came her crying then, turned into screaming. She wanted so badly to love them back, but how could she if she never knew what love was. Hatred toward people burned in the little girls heart. What happened in her first three years marked her heart in way only God could change. The love her parents showed her was so foreign and yet so addicting. As she grew older fear of losing them grew more each day. She was falling in love. Then they told her about who Love is, how He brought her to them, how he died for her sins and how He loves her. She believed and loves Him back. That day she accepted Christ to be the boss of her life.
The little girl is me.

    I’m alive and shouldn’t be at least that’s what the world says.
It would’ve made the most sense, that is why they call me a survivor.
My first three years of abandonment are only explained by a miracle. What
you just read was only a glimpse of what I went through. As I mentioned I hated people and was locked out from reality. I felt like the world was moving around me waiting to be touched and I was in glass. The only emotion I felt for years was fear. Fear of being hit again, left again, and unwanted. But when I asked Christ to be the boss of my life I became alive. I would “run” the best I could with my hurt little legs, sing, love, and be fearless because He is living me in. There were times I have forgotten my first love, Christ (The Scariest Road), but like in the orphanage He hears my cry and calls me His.

    Romans 8:15 “The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”

Babies were placed on bread trays stacked on racks.
Babies were placed on bread trays and stacked on racks.
Nicolae Ceausescu, the man who started the orphanages.
Nicolae Ceausescu, the man who started the orphanages.
we would rock ourselves for self soothing, and look at our hands because it was the only thing to look at.
we would rock ourselves for self soothing, and look at our hands because it was the only thing to look at.

    Some ask how  could I believe in God after what I went through. My answer is this. I believe there’s a hell. I’ve only tasted it in just three years. Mean people are the result of sin and so badly the Devil wants to rob me from the truth of knowing God and who He is and how He loves us. The Devil thrives off of abuse and will do anything to pull us away from God. Why? Because God is love, joy and enough. 

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/02/20/ptsd-black-sheep/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2015/06/29/life-verse/

https://hylachamberlain.wordpress.com/2014/09/05/her-identity/

Courageous Child

Mihaela Echols37 Comments
 
 
                 Outward joy is when everyone can see the joy of the Lord spilling out everywhere.
 
      Four years ago I met this little girl. I loved her and still do. She is what people would call a walking miracle. With all the dirt, blood, tears and abandonment in her past she smiles. This little girl is my sister, Anissa. My family adopted her when she was five. When I look at her I see what she’s been through. But this is only because I know. If I were a stranger I never would have guessed it with the biggest smile she wears everyday and the most hopeful look in her eyes. Sometimes I think kids get it more than adults do. She doesn’t stop to think and frown at what had happened. Instead she loves her new life and embraces it everyday. How do I know this? She calls my mom, mom and believes it, she calls my dad, dad and believes it, and she calls Jesus, Jesus and believes it. She is always the one who has to pray at the dinner table. At her adoption July 15th 2011 there was a man who had helped with Anissa’s case and he said “I keep a picture of the old her to remind myself why I do what I do.”
Everyone of the social workers were amazed at how different of a child she was from the first time they’ve met her and who she is that day. A miracle? I know so. 
 
    Romans 15:13
“May the God of  hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the  Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”
 
 
 
 

Show and Tell

Mihaela Echols22 Comments

cool your dad got you  a ball, a toy car, a doll, bet I could top them all! I thought sitting in my desk waiting for my turn in Mrs. Jeffers second grade class. Finally it was my turn.

“What’d you bring for show and tell Mihaela?” she had asked. I could feel my self smiling that mischievous smile I always smile like I was up to no good. My mom was standing in the door way.

“This here is my sister!” I said dragging her in the doorway displaying her in front of the classroom. Jenny, my sister, who was shy ran out the door. So I dragged her back in. I was so proud of having a sister. My parents went to Guatemala and had adopted her. My classmates gifts couldn’t top the gift I had to show them. Even if  Johnny got ten thousand trucks and Suzie got a million dolls no one was ever feeling what I had felt that day, proud. I’m twenty-one now and I can still say giving me a sister is the best gift my parents have ever given me, and now I have five!

Family is amazing! And I thank God for them every time I think of them. But no one not even my parents could give me or us what God has given us.

Ephesians 2:4-8

4 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, 5 made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. 6 And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, 7 in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. 8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast

By: Mihaela Chamberlain

 

More on :My family

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WANTED

Mihaela Echols33 Comments

4/21/12

Believe it or not this poem was one of the hardest for me to write. It was actually supposed to be written a month ago. But I never really had the time to sit down and do it. With a lot of studying, looking up verses and putting in my own experiences I had finally come up with this poem. It’s about adoption. In it I’m comparing human adoption with God adopting us. With adopting it requires: sacrifice, a home, paper work, provision, teaching, leading and protection.  God wants to meet us in these ways too. So do you accept it?

There is only one whose  love is  unconditional   Psalm 193:15-16

Real and untraditional

He’s like a father who keeps us on track              (Father) Hebrews 12:9

So our character isn’t lacked

His name protects us from all above             (Guardian) Romans 8:38-39

Fearless and strong only because of love

Giving us plants, animals and seasons is how He provides   Matt 6:26-34

Reassuring He’ll never leave our side                    Hebrews 13:5

He gave all that He could give                               Hebrews 10:14

So that we may live                                                John 3:16-17

He prepared His heart and home to be shared     John 14:2

Only because He really cared

It’s all permanent and signed                                 Isaiah 49:13-18

You choose to be defined

You see God adopts us too

But its all up to you                                                 Ephesians 1:4-5

Romans 8:15

“The Spirit you received does not make you slaves so that you live in fear again; rather the spirit you received brought your adoption to son ship and by Him we cry “Abba Father”

-Mihaela Chamberlain

My Adoption Story

My Mom’s Story